Entry 23 - Sri Kriti

Situation 1 - @ Work Place
Background:
Imagine you are working in an IT firm. Your Job involves meeting with several customers along with your Boss. Your Boss is a good man and he is very supportive of your role and gives you a lot of space to grow. However he is not very good at receiving negative feedback.
Problem Statement:
In a recent customer interaction you have heard customer’s complain about your Boss’ bad body odour. They were saying that if they have to deal with it again they will consider stopping business. You overheard this conversation and were not given this feedback directly. How will you give this feedback to him such that the situation is corrected?

Answer:

I would invite my boss to a meeting saying that the team members are not following a proper dress code and are not grooming themselves properly,as a result of which the customers are unlikely to give the business to us.And that it would be great if he comes to the meeting and address the team in this regard.So, that it can cause some motivation in the team if someone like him would address them.
Organizers Feedback: Answer is good on the idea but the explanation and some further steps are seeming incomplete

Situation 2 - @ Home

Background:
You live in the same city as your in-laws and have recently bought a new home. This is your dream home and you have spent a little more than what you had planned to because this is a one-time investment and a few more thousands every month in mortgage was ok for this home. Now that the house is ready you have to consult your In-Laws (DH’s parents) for the house warming ceremony. Your in-laws are nice people and your relationship with them is cordial. (there are some grouses but that’s normal and nothing major).

Problem Statement:
At a dinner table your in-laws clarify that they want a GRAND house warming with all relatives – gifts and clothes in order. They have stated clearly that it has been a long time since they called any of their kith and kin and this is an opportune moment. You are totally shocked and upset because you want a simple home ceremony and want to minimize the cost of this event since you went overboard buying the house.

When you talk to you DH his comment is “Talk to them and convince if you can. I am ok either ways it will mean another personal loan but I would rather have a happy after math. Whatever you do I don’t want a fight in the family and want a happy situation so I leave it to you. Either adjust or convince. I will be neutral.”

What will you do – Agree to them or convince them and how?
Answer:

First OF ALL, I would say that no parent is irresponsible.as it is clearly mentioned they have a good relation with every person of the house.I would in a friendly manner discuss the furnishings and every other aspects and budget for each and every thing we do for the house and ask their advice.so,that they would come up with some ideas or the other and break down on a point where we need to spend more money and lacking the necessary amount.and if we minimize the other expenses we can be able to build a perfect dream home where we can live happily.and if the house warming is concerned we can have everybody for the party but only necessary things need to be done,without going overboard and withput causing any hindrance to the budget.and I will assure them that everybody will be taken care of with utmost respect and I need your support in this regard.this is how I would like to convince them.

Organizers Feedback: Talking to them and involving them in the areas where you are bleeding will make them realize.. However this is a double edged sword - if you don’t like their choices of décor or they economize there for the function it will be a ra deal. However its a good solution.

Situation 3 - @Work Place

Background:
Imagine you are a manager with 2 people reporting to you. Both of them have their unique strengths and need to work together to get the required result for you and the department. There are no other people with similar skills in your organization.

Problem Statement:
These two people could set a meeting to fire with their spats. They DO NOT get along well at all and a majority of you time is getting wasted addressing their interpersonal issues. Initially you thought these are small personality differences, but now its impacting your deliverables and putting your department in RED. You have to find a solution to this and ensure the tasks are completed on time. At the same time remember that it is not easy to find a replacement so it’s important to make them both feel important.

How will you solve this situation?

Answer:

I will be friendly with both of them.and create situations where they should work collectively.give a task to both of them to complete in time.I would set different targets for both of them.so, that they can be competitive and completing the tasks.arrange team outings where their collective effort need to be done.
Organizers Feedback: Answer is good but the rationale could have been explained better.

Situation 4 - @Friend Circle

Background:
You and X are very good friends. Our husbands are colelagues and You got married at the same time and met as their wives. You have become good friends over these years. Your children are both 3 months apart and are 4 years old. You are really family friends and have known each other for the past 5-6 years now. You both have 1 boy each. The children play and study together.

Problem Statement:
Of late you have observed that X criticizes your son whenever you and she are alone with the kids. When your DHs are around she is very sweet and is complementing him but when you are alone and the kids are playing she is spitting a list of negatives about your child (when he is around). Initially you didn’t mind it since you consider her a foster mom. But you have started seeing you child becoming reserved and losing his spark in her presence.

Your DH has told you – “This is a matter between the women. I cannot fight with X’s husband for it. It will be silly. So find a way to discuss with her and solve it.”

PS: As a family you people are very close and cannot avoid X. You don’t want to break your friendship. But you have to correct this situation. How will you solve this situation?

Answer:

I would minimize the time I spend with her.and make my son indulge in other activities.and when we meet up,I would bring some coloring pages or some collective playing games for both of them and would tell them to play with those things and whoever does a better task will get some treat.and I’ll try to indulge them in someplay.so that my son won’t pay any attention to her words.and while talking if she raise the topic. I would cleverly change the topic ,to the one of her interest and try to avoid the negative talk.and if we meet up frequently also,I would reduce the meeting time.and check that nobody is hurt.
Organizers Feedback: Again one half of the answer is attempted well. This is a nice way of avoiding conflict and correcting the situation. However your kid needs reassurance and needs to be spoken to.

Situation 5 - @A Party (Social Circle)

Background:
You are at a party with some common friends. One particular lady is envious of your dress and has made it obvious that you are looking unexpectedly pretty. You are secretly happy because this is your precious find and your love your dress (it’s a SALWAR SUIT) with all the heavy work.

Problem Statement:
As a part of the party dinner this lady accidentally spills SAMBAR on your dress. She apologizes profusely but you feel it was intentional. When you look around you don’t find another lady with your height and weight so chances of a dress change are remote. Your house is 2 hrs drive away.

How will you live through the party? How will you fix this jealous lady for this embarrassment caused to you?

Answer:

at first I would I would clean the sambhar on the dress and wash it.try to dry it using a dryer,if the party is at the house.otherwise I would leave it to dry by itself.I would cover it with the dupatta.and try not to stay till the end of the party.

Organizers Feedback: This answer addressed only half of the question without a mention to the other half. Incomplete answer.