Entry 9 - Madhavi Pisupati

· Situation 1 - @ Work Place

Background:

Imagine you are working in an IT firm. Your Job involves meeting with several customers along with your Boss. Your Boss is a good man and he is very supportive of your role and gives you a lot of space to grow. However he is not very good at receiving negative feedback.

Problem Statement:

In a recent customer interaction you have heard customer’s complain about your Boss’ bad body odour. They were saying that if they have to deal with it again they will consider stopping business. You overheard this conversation and were not given this feedback directly. How will you give this feedback to him such that the situation is corrected?

Answer:

I Gift Him A Good Deodorant …. In a diplomatic way …

Yes as he is good at everything instead of discussing the problem with him straight away ,I will follow a different positive path … First of all I would like to thank him for what ever he did to My career growth … for that I choose to gift him ,and that gift I choose a good deodorant and a watch (as he is a Male it is definitely a good choice) …. On one fine day I approach him and just tell him how thank full I’m for all his support … … and tell him that he is Mr. Perfect … He just need little bit extra and then gift him and ask him to please use the stuff so that I will feel happy … This will be an immediate solution to the problem and later after some days will try to tell him to continue the usage …

· Situation 2 - @ Home

Background:

You live in the same city as your in-laws and have recently bought a new home. This is your dream home and you have spent a little more than what you had planned to because this is a one-time investment and a few more thousands every month in mortgage was ok for this home. Now that the house is ready you have to consult your In-Laws (DH’s parents) for the house warming ceremony. Your in-laws are nice people and your relationship with them is cordial. (there are some grouses but that’s normal and nothing major).

Problem Statement:

At a dinner table your in-laws clarify that they want a GRAND house warming with all relatives – gifts and clothes in order. They have stated clearly that it has been a long time since they called any of their kith and kin and this is an opportune moment. You are totally shocked and upset because you want a simple home ceremony and want to minimize the cost of this event since you went overboard buying the house.

When you talk to you DH his comment is “Talk to them and convince if you can. I am ok either ways it will mean another personal loan but I would rather have a happy after math. Whatever you do I don’t want a fight in the family and want a happy situation so I leave it to you. Either adjust or convince. I will be neutral.”

What will you do – Agree to them or convince them and how?

Answer:

Money is not everything … Happiness is important …

Definitely agree to them but will also try to convince them to reduce the expenses as much as possible explaining them the practical issues … Like instead of giving clothes we can opt a good return gift for the whole family … and lot of other things …

Once we start the discussion with a positive note things will definitely work and they will surely understand the situation … and then we can plan for a big party with a minimal amount …

Even tough its an extra burden to us, it just needs few more months of extra effort in savings ,but the happiness we get is for a life time …

· Situation 3 - @Work Place

Background:

Imagine you are a manager with 2 people reporting to you. Both of them have their unique strengths and need to work together to get the required result for you and the department. There are no other people with similar skills in your organization.

Problem Statement:

These two people could set a meeting to fire with their spats. They DO NOT get along well at all and a majority of you time is getting wasted addressing their interpersonal issues. Initially you thought these are small personality differences, but now its impacting your deliverables and putting your department in RED. You have to find a solution to this and ensure the tasks are completed on time. At the same time remember that it is not easy to find a replacement so it’s important to make them both feel important.

How will you solve this situation?

Answer:

As both of them are with Good Skills will try to solve in a Informal & straight forward manner.

Will plan for a informal lunch(may be in My House) and try to bring a friendly atmosphere between them … Then will raise the problem and explain the situation … will try to find out the problem between them … convince them … will discuss the problems arising because of their behavior … As both of them have their own strengths will explain them the power of team work and how imp they both are for the project … In the same flow I will explain the negative points like how their behavior effects their career growth and positive points to like how they can improve their skills further with mutual coordination …. Can repeat this type of informal gatherings with other team members and conduct some team games this helps to develop a friendly atmosphere and will improve their comfort levels … This may certainly help to get some improvement in the situation …

· Situation 4 - @Friend Circle

Background:

You and X are very good friends. Our husbands are colelagues and You got married at the same time and met as their wives. You have become good friends over these years. Your children are both 3 months apart and are 4 years old. You are really family friends and have known each other for the past 5-6 years now. You both have 1 boy each. The children play and study together.

Problem Statement:

Of late you have observed that X criticizes your son whenever you and she are alone with the kids. When your DHs are around she is very sweet and is complementing him but when you are alone and the kids are playing she is spitting a list of negatives about your child (when he is around). Initially you didn’t mind it since you consider her a foster mom. But you have started seeing you child becoming reserved and losing his spark in her presence.

Your DH has told you – “This is a matter between the women. I cannot fight with X’s husband for it. It will be silly. So find a way to discuss with her and solve it.”

PS: As a family you people are very close and cannot avoid X. You don’t want to break your friendship. But you have to correct this situation. How will you solve this situation?

Answer:

Close friend kabatti matter ni manchigane deal cheyali …

Start discussing this issue in pleasant manner by depicting it in a short story (or with some X persons ref who has faced this type of issue …) which resembles this issue with a final conclusion from the story and make that person understand the situation … Andaru(both the families with husbands) oka place lo gather ainappudu slow ga topic raise cheyali ila …. Some where oka article chusanu andulo ila pedda vallu kids ni criticize cheste a impact valla mida negative ga padutundi ta ala ala ani convey cheyali … Edo oka third person reference to matter anta express cheyali ,direct ga cheppalme kada close friends kabatti chala sensitive issue …. Inka ala chese vallu koncham alochinchali chinna pillalni ela ante valla chinna manasulu nochukuntai kada ani kasepu ala discuss chuste matter ardham avutundi kabatti hopefully inkosari a pani chyeadu … andari mundu topic raise chestam kabatti DH’s kuda sure ga a discussion lo involve avutaru so idi oka ALERT ga anukuni inkosari repeat cheyadu ….

· Situation 5 - @A Party (Social Circle)

Background:

You are at a party with some common friends. One particular lady is envious of your dress and has made it obvious that you are looking unexpectedly pretty. You are secretly happy because this is your precious find and your love your dress (it’s a SALWAR SUIT) with all the heavy work.

Problem Statement:

As a part of the party dinner this lady accidentally spills SAMBAR on your dress. She apologizes profusely but you feel it was intentional. When you look around you don’t find another lady with your height and weight so chances of a dress change are remote. Your house is 2 hrs drive away.

How will you live through the party? How will you fix this jealous lady for this embarrassment caused to you?

Answer:

Better not to make a big issue out of it … Silence is the best answer …

Some times Fight chesi win avvadam kanna silence to win avvali … Even though the lady made it intentionally there no point in making a big issue of that … This wont fix the problem instead it will draw everyone’s attention and make the situation more dirty … When she apologizes … Simply smile and say “ It’s okay, sometimes it may happen” in a pleasant manner so that other person understand the situation and make her realize…First will wash my dress then approach the party host and explain her the situation and tell her that I want to leave … Situation ardham cheskuni kudirite alternative emaina cheptundi otherwise wish chesi akkada nunchi vacheyatame … Godava cheyakunda lite teeskuni party nunchi vacheste that particular lady will definitely realize her mistake …